The Wee Magic Stane

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Melody - The Old Orange Flute
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John MacEvoy

Oh, the Dean of Westminister
Was a powerful man,
He held all the strings
Of the State in his hand,
But wi' a' this great business
It flustered him nane,
Till some rogues ran away
With his wee magic stane!
Chorus:
Sing too-ra-lie-oo-ra-lie-oo-ra-lie-ay!

2. Noo the stane had great powers
That could do sic a thing
And withoot it, it seemed,
We'd be wantin' a King,
So he called in the polis,
And gave this decree:
"Go and hunt oot the stane
And return it to me!"
Chorus:

3. So the polis went beetlin'
Up tae the North
They huntit the Clyde
And they huntit the Forth,
But the wild folk up yonder
Just kidded them a'
For they did not believe
It was magic at a'!
Chorus:

4. Noo the Provost o' Glasgow,
Sir Victor by name,
Was awfy pit oot
When he heard of the stane,
So he offert the statues
That staun' in the Square
That the high church's masons
Might mak' a few mair!
Chorus:

5. When the Dean of Westminister
With this was acquaint,
He sent for Sir Victor
And made him a Saint!
"Now it's no use your sending
Your statues down heah,"
Said the Dean, "But you've given me
A jolly good ideah!"
Chorus:

6. So he quarried a stane
Of the very same stuff
An' he dressed it all up
'till it looked like enough
Then he sent for the Press
And announced that The Stane
Had been found and returned
To Westminister again.
Chorus:

7. When the reivers found out
What Westminister had done
They went aboot diggin' up
Stanes by the ton!
And fur each wan they finished
They entered the claim
That THIS was the true
And original stane!
Chorus:

8. Noo the cream o' the joke
Still remains tae be tell't
Fur the bloke that was turnin' them
Off on the belt
At th' peak o' production
Was so sorely pressed
That the real one got bunged
In along wi' th' rest!
Chorus:

9. So if y'ever come upon
A stane wi' a ring
Just sit yersel' doon
And appoint yersel' King!
Fur there's nane would be able
T' challenge yer claim,
That ye'd croont yersel King
On the Destiny Stane!
Chorus:

In 1951, a group of Scots Nationalists managed to reclaim the Stone of Scone. It was missing for a few weeks until it was returned.
There has been some controversy as to whether the English Southrons received the real one back.

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