The Smugglers Song

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Melody -
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Rudyard Kipling

If you wake at midnight, and hear a horse’s feet
Don't go drawing back the blinds, or looking in the street
Them that asks no questions isn’t told a lie
Watch the wall my darling when the gentlemen go by.
Chorus:
Five and twenty ponies trotting through the dark
Brandy for the parson, baccy for the clerk
Laces for a lady, letters for a spy
And watch the wall my darling, while the gentlemen go by.

2. Running round the woodlump if you chance to find
Little barrel, roped and tarred, all full of brandy-wine
Don't shout to come and look, nor use ‘em for your play
Put the brishwood back again - they’ll be gone next day.
Chorus:

3. If you see the stable door setting open wide;
If you see a tired horse lying down inside;
If your mother mends a coat cut about and tore;
If the lining’s wet and warm - don't you ask no more!
Chorus:

4. If you met King George’s men, dressed in blue and red,
You be careful what you say, and mindful what is said.
If they call you, "Pretty maid", and chuck you ‘neath the chin
Don't you tell where no one is, nor yet where no ones been.
Chorus:

5. Knocks and footsteps round the house - whistles after dark
You’ve no call for running out till the house dogs bark
Trusty’s here, and Pincher’s here, and see how dumb the lie
They don't fret to follow when the gentlemen go by!
Chorus:

6. If you do as you've been told, likely there’s a chance
You’ll be give a dainty doll, all the way from France
With a cap of Valenciennes and a velvet hood
A present from the gentlemen, along ‘o being good.
Chorus:
Five and twenty ponies trotting through the dark
Brandy for the parson, baccy for the clerk
Them that asks no questions isn’t told a lie
Watch the wall my darling when the gentlemen go by.


From his book "Puck of Pook's Hill".

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